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#Transgender: The Issue Of Passing. #tgirl #transsexual #transwoman




To some it is a rude concept. To some it is a socio-political issue. To the transsexual, it can make the difference between forever being a object or living a comfortable life. 
 
"Passing", the act of successfully appearing as a desired definition of person in the world, is a complex matter. Not only does the very accomplishment of passing require a vast number of factors be brought together and applied correctly, but it also raises questions about the nature of self definition, personal freedom, and social taboos.
At the heart of being transsexual is the absolute certainty of being trapped in the wrong body, the wrong physical sex, and the wrong definition within the world. The transsexual seeks to correct a flaw of birth, to become a preferred expression of gender. Tied into this basic, biological drive, is the way in which a society accepts and permits gender to be expressed.


While most human societies have universal concepts of gender expression, there are also unique cultural expectations and taboos that themselves alter over time. To enjoy a life accepted and embraced by other human beings, every person must to some degree compromise or alter their natural behavior or desires to fit a common cultural agreement.

People who refuse, or who cannot meet the minimum expectations and requirements of their culture increasingly are rejected by it, to the point of total exclusion, or even violence and annihilation.

Existing within any society is a balancing act between the individual and the expectations of the culture. This becomes a very severe matter when fundamental cultural taboos and requirements are involved.

There is probably no more fundamental cultural definition than that of gender expression.

To be outside the boundaries of sanctioned gender expression is to threaten, at a basic level, the established comfortability and security of a culture. The more rigid the culture, the more profound this effect.

In modern, Euro-Christian post industrial society, rigidity with regard to gender taboos is fairly severe.

The transsexual, in quest to achieve agreement between brain and body, must also cope with a vast array of expectations and taboos that affect every aspect of life, every moment of action, and every nuance of appearance. To succeed without facing a lifelong burden of exclusion, the transsexual must somehow come to terms with both biology, and society.


A transsexual is raised as a gender opposite to their inner gender. The cultural training, and reinforcement of gender specific behaviors, confuses and torments them. By the time they have the opportunity to change their physical sex to agree with their true gender, they are faced with a triple cultural problem. The transsexual must not only unlearn a lifetime of enforced gender role behavior, make up almost overnight for the loss of a lifetime of gender role training culturally appropriate to their true inner gender, but must also find a way to comfortably express their unique personality honestly through that new gender role.

This enormous requirement is only half of the entire path to success, for there is also the matter of physical appearance.

Within human society, the gender definition that other people create when faced with a person, is determined by essentially two things. One is the sum total of behavior, motion, action and emotional presence of the person. The other is the physical appearance, the shape, look, sound, even the smell of the person. In effect, an equation is performed that totals the many factors, and a result, male, female, both, or neither results.

In every way, it is safer, easier, and less filled with suffering to fit neatly within one of the twin accepted poles of the current definition of gender: male or female.


To accomplish this is a complex undertaking. This is "Passing".

Hormones can take care of all, some, or little of the physical side of gender presentation, depending on age and receptivity. Almost all human beings can accept, and be altered by, both male and female hormones. Only a very rare number of humans are insensitive to the effect of applied hormones, and if those rare individuals happen to be transsexual, the soul is in a very difficult position indeed.

The effect of hormones varies somewhat from person to person, and also is dependent on age. The younger a person is, the more quickly, and effectively will be the result of taking hormones. By age 18, the effectiveness of hormone treatment begins to plummet. By age 25, hormone sensitivity is half what it is at 18, by age 30 it levels off at one fourth. This level of sensitivity is maintained for the remainder of life.

Physical passability is fundamentally based on the effectiveness of hormone therapy. No surgery, or other treatment, can replace this most basic foundation of physical sex. Clearly, to be accepted as the correct sex, early hormone therapy is without question the single greatest factor in achieving passability.

Advanced age provides a benefit different from youth, but just as valuable. Advanced age renders both males and females increasingly similar in appearance, as physical sex cues wither and fade, as skin wrinkles and the flesh degrades. This degradation of aging, masks obvious physical differences between the sexes, and thus aids passability.

The very few physical aspects of sex differentiation that hormones cannot change, such as the voice in Male-To-Female transsexuals, and the developed genitals of either sex, must be addressed by other means.

Social passability is a complex mix of natural behaviors and learned affectations.

Worldwide cultural definitions of gender expression have a surprisingly high degree of commonality. How a man is fundamentally expected to act and behave versus how a woman is expected to act and behave is essentially consistent amongst all populations of human beings, regardless of the degree of isolation. We know that gender is hardwired into the brain. It would be irrational to fail to recognize that much of the cultural definitions of gender expression are the result of averaging inborn gender behaviors into a basic human stereotype. However, many arbitrary behavioral expectations and roles are often tacked onto this basic observation. These additional rules change with time, technology, and location.


In order to pass effectively, providing that the physical side is granted, 
the transsexual must study and incorporate selected behaviors and conditioning to complete gender presentation. Each transsexual must choose for themselves which of the cultural sex role components they can either live with, or find natural for themselves to express.

A common trap is adhering too strongly to cultural stereotypes, which generally works against passability. To pass successfully, the best tactic is to express the honest self. Since much of cultural sex roles are based on observation of real gender linked behaviors, finding an internal and natural self expression will accomplish as much, or more, than learning an affected role. It is often more successful, precisely because it is not a role, but an honest form of presence in the world.

In a nutshell:

"Passing" increases survivability and overall happiness for the transsexual. Passing is composed of a physical side and a behavioral side. Earliest possible use of hormones is the best guarantee of physical passability. Unlearning sex roles and expressing natural, inborn gender behavior is the most important part of successful behavioral passing.
Love Angelbea


 
 

#Transgender #Tgril #Transsexual Overcome Envy and Comparison

How to Overcome Envy and Comparison 

Do you ever compare yourself to cisgender women? Or girls who are further along on their feminine journeys?

Have you ever looked at somebody else’s life or looks and thought… why can’t I have that?

If so, you’re not alone.

It’s only human to feel jealous or envious from time to time.

But it sure doesn’t feel good! And it can keep you from reaching your own goals.

So how can you deal with these feelings?

Read on to discover 5 ways to overcome envy and comparison.

1. Realize that you don’t see the full picture

It’s easy to feel inadequate when looking at somebody’s flawless photos on Facebook. The Internet is the ultimate “envy amplifier,” but there are a couple things you should keep in mind:

Most people show an idealized version of themselves online. The photos you’re looking at might be Photoshopped or use flattering filters. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, just know they’re not a reflection of somebody’s 24/7 reality.
You have no idea what’s happening behind the scenes. Everybody has problems and struggles, and for all you know, they might be dealing with their own feelings of insecurity.
Remember that the next time you scroll through social media!



2. Be inspired

When we envy somebody, it’s a sign that they have something we want for ourselves. That in itself isn’t a bad thing.

Instead of letting somebody else’s good looks or success make you feel bad, let it inspire you to reach for the same.

Set a realistic goal and channel your energy towards achieving it. Taking positive action feels amazing, so this can be a great way to turn things around.

3. Get a life


This might sound harsh, but I say it with love.

If you find yourself spending a lot of time sitting around and comparing yourself to others, it’s easy to get caught in negative thought loops.

Quite simply, you need to spend less time in your head and more time out living your fabulous life!

If you’re busy having fun, making friends, and exploring new activities, there’s no time to obsess about others. Problem solved!

4. Surround yourself with positive people

Are you surrounded by people who constantly complain about how unfair life is? Or who are always trying to outdo each other like a bunch of teenage girls?

Those thought patterns are contagious, so the best thing you can do is find better people to be around: People who are happy, positive, and grateful.

I realize there are people you can’t cut out completely (like family), but look for positive outlets. Explore Meetup groups, support groups, or positive forums or Facebook groups.

5. Appreciate yourself

One of my favorite sayings goes:

Another woman’s beauty is not the absence of your own.

The best way to overcome envy is to shift the focus back to yourself and everything that makes YOU special, unique, and beautiful.

It’s not like there’s a limited supply of beauty or success out there, so keep reminding yourself of your own strengths and attributes.

Is this trite advice? Maybe. Does it work? ABSOLUTELY.

How do YOU deal with envy and comparison?

It’s normal to feel jealous or envious from time to time. But the sooner you get over it and put the focus back on your own life and goals, the better!


Because the truth is, girlfriend, YOU are amazing!

As always, I’d love to hear your thoughts. Have you ever struggled with comparison or envy? If so, how did you deal with it?

Please share in the comments below!
Angelbea

#Transgender: Tips for Surviving Despair. #tgirl #transwoman #transsexual #depression

Tips for Surviving Despair

Guest Author: Anon


Know what I found to be the biggest challenge in overcoming despair? Blaming myself for getting into the bad situation plus not acting to get out of the mess. 


Overcoming Shame
If you’ve ever seen the movie “The Edge”: you might recall a profound statement by Anthony Hopkins regarding why most people die when lost in the wilderness: “They die of shame”. Based upon experience, I’m guessing such passing isn’t limited to the wild blue yonder.

As my life deteriorated: 
I froze. I couldn’t function. I was ashamed of people I hurt. I beat myself up over mistakes.

I almost died…
of shame.
Faith & Prayer

I can’t begin to explain the power of prayer & a basis in spirituality. I lost my connection with organized religion after being out-and-proud as transgender…but I never lost my faith in prayers to God. I owe my mother for this healthy habit: she was a devout believer in prayer.
Manage What You Can

The trick to surviving complete chaos is to not look very far into the future & manage what you can 
now. At times, I my entire “future plans” included only the next two hours. If I looked beyond that juncture? I felt overwhelmed & depressed.Forgive Yourself



I wasn’t yet able to love myself - I’ll always struggle with feeling deserved of love. I did, however, learn to forgive myself for getting in such a bad situation. I certainly didn’t “try” to end up a mess. I promised myself I would make better decisions if I found my way clear of this labyrinth. I openly & vocally apologized to myself…and asked myself to forgive “me’. Alas, it worked. 


What gifts did I receive from surviving complete financial devastation? 
Perhaps the greatest gift from my devastation was an improved sense of self. It’s only after you lose everything that you discover what you “really” have…you have yourself!



Other important lessons, included:

  • I discovered I didn’t require a single penny to my name to be truly happy.
  • I also never feel compelled to “act out” as if I’m someone important or wealthy. Know that type of behavior? Nowadays, it never bothers me to proclaim “I can’t afford it” even when by other people’s standards - I could. I’m much more humble about what challenges I can face with life & admire humility in others.



Thank-you Anon.

#Transgender #Feminine, your Body Language

Feminine Body Language Secrets Revealed
 

Hello, lovelies! This week’s hot topic is: BODY LANGUAGE. Body language counts for over 50% of what you are communicating, so this is a huge part of your feminine image.

Body language consists of:

    Posture
    Gestures
    Facial expressions
    Eye contact

I’m going to talk about posture in Part 1 of my “Feminine Body Language Secrets” series.

Here are the 3 biggest differences between the way men and women hold their bodies:

1. Open vs. closed

 

The #1 posture rule you need to remember is that women take up less space than men. This might seem obvious, but I’m amazed at many girls forget to keep their legs together and their elbows in. (Genetic girls, too!)

Open body positions are associated with the display of power. Besides making you look more passive and feminine, a closed body position makes you appear physically smaller.

2. Straight vs. curved

 



Sexy women are all about the curves, including the way they hold their bodies.

Next time you’re standing in line somewhere, notice how many women put their weight onto one leg, thrusting their hip out. This creates an S-shaped curve in the body. Notice how men tend to stand with their weight evenly spread over both feet.

You can create this S-curve with your body when you are sitting, too. Either cross your legs or put your weight onto one hip.

3. Weight forward vs. weight neutral

 
Have you ever noticed how many men lean forward at the shoulders – particularly if they are trying to establish their dominance? Contrast this to women, who tend to keep their shoulders back and their weight neutral.

Keeping your weight evenly balanced can be tricky in heels, so you need to be especially careful not to lean forward when you are standing or walking. (You shouldn’t lean back either – so get out those stilettos and practice, practice, practice!)



I’ll discuss gestures, facial expressions, and eye contact in my next blog post. But in the meantime, I’d love to hear your thoughts on this! What other subtle body language differences have you noticed between men and women?

Love,

Angel Bea

#Transsexual: Passing as a woman

“Passing as a woman” is the Holy Grail for many crossdressers and transgender women.

But it is really a goal worth pursuing?

If you’ve been afraid to show your feminine side for fear of not “passing,” it might be time to rethink your priorities.

I believe everybody has the potential to pass, but let’s face it… it’s not always easy!

It could take years to master all the subtleties of walking, talking, and acting like a woman. You might even require surgery to be truly passable in all situations.


That means that unless you plan to live as a woman full time, trying to become 100% passable just isn’t practical.

Rather than getting hung up on passing vs. not passing, I suggest you make it your goal to “blend in” instead.

Blending in means you look feminine enough not to stand out in a negative way – even if you aren’t 100% passable.

Most people don’t scrutinize everybody around them, so unless there’s something glaringly off about you, you are unlikely to attract a second glance.

Does this mean everybody will think you are a cisgender woman? Probably not. But it doesn’t matter.



The happiest crossdressers and transgender women I know don’t care whether they pass or not. They care about being themselves.

Passing is great when it happens, but there’s nothing wrong with being seen as the classy crossdresser or transgender woman that you are!



As long as you choose the right environment and present yourself well, you are likely to be met with acceptance.

Now I’d love to hear from YOU!


Click here to take my Passing Poll and share your thoughts about this important topic.

Love,

#Tranny: How to Be Girly 24 Hours Per Day


Wow! Thanks for all the feedback on , Where Do You Present Yourself En Femme?

If you’re like most of my readers, you keep your femme self private. But that doesn’t mean you have to lose your girly side when it’s time to put on the pants! There are lots of ways to stay in touch with your femininity – even in male mode:

1. Wear women’s clothing on the sly.





 


Sneaking a piece of women’s clothing into your outfit is a great way to feel girly. Be creative with this! A lot of styles can pass for unisex, so try: basic tees, button-down shirts, jeans, pants and even suits (very few people will notice the buttons on the opposite side).

Don’t forget about accessories! Try wearing women’s boots or using a tote bag as a laptop bag or briefcase.

2. Use the power of scent.





Scents have a powerful effect on your brain chemistry and mood, so this is a great way to connect with your femininity.

Wear women’s perfume instead of cologne. Musky fragrances are more masculine than florals so you can wear them without anybody knowing your secret.

If you can’t wear perfume, burn a scented candle with a feminine fragrance in your home or office.

3. Surround yourself with girly reminders.



Finally, be sure you are constantly reminded that underneath that male exterior is a beautiful, feminine being!

Photos of your femme self are very powerful. Keep them in a folder on your computer, in your wallet, or even framed and hung up so you can see them often.

You could also carry around items personalized with your feminine name, such as a keychain, wallet, or coffee mug. Some of my girls even get tattoos of their names!



I’d love to hear how YOU stay connected to your femininity. Leave me your comments below!

Love,
Angel Bea

My #Masturbating: #Masturbation Stories Tales from the twat.

Super tampon


I usually take a super tampon and shove it in my pussy, then I ride it on a pillow until I cum. It really feels like you have a dick inside you.


Lots o' tampons
I remember as a teenager, before I moved out on my own and was able to buy ""real"" sex toys, I had to make do with things around the house. I realized (this was when I was still a virgin and pretty tight) that using a tampon as a dildo while I used my index and middle finger, one on each side of my clit, and rubbed it hard, that I could have an orgasm pretty quickly, and it was better than just masturbating with my hands. Over time, I was able to work my way up to having about 4 or 5 tampons in at the same time (all UNUSED, of course) quite easily, and having really rocking orgasms.


Plastic pleasure
I've found that in some stores, the tampon sizes can range from itty bitty to the width of a toilet paper roll. Once, I got a package, took out the tampon, and use the plastic applicator as my own little dildo. It works great!

Tantalizing Tampons
I like to use tampons. It works better if you start off going in and out with a super absorbent one. Then when you’re ready use the smallest one you can find, it works great. Hang your legs off your bed. I get horny just talking about it.


Butt floss
I like to take a long piece of string (not too thick) and push all of it into my asshole, leaving just a little hanging out. Then I slowly pull it all out of my ass as I rub my clit with my middle finger. I squirt my juices within seconds. I also like to put a tampon up my ass and then rub my clit until I'm about to cum, then pull out the tampon.


Tampon tweaker
First I go to a hot site like this and get very horny. Then I get two super plus tampons and insert them into my vagina and my asshole. I lie flat on my stomach and start massaging my clit area and pushing the tampon deeper and deeper. Meanwhile I'm pulling hard on the string of the tampon hanging out of my asshole. Right before I reach orgasm, I pull the string hanging out of my ass very hard, and eventually pull it out. It's amazing.

I think I'll do it right now!
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#Masturbation #masturbating: Self-lovin' #Sex positions. #Pleasure


Many people masturbate but are uncomfortable the topic or feel guilty it. I am a 33 year old female who is confident and comfortable about her sexuality.

I am a self confessed masturbation lover. Please don’t get me wrong I love sex but also love masturbation, I actually masturbate more than I have sex. I masturbate at least once a day usually alone but sometimes mutually with my husband. When I was a teenage I used to be ashamed of it and thought it was unnatural until I talked to my aunty who reassured me that it was perfectly normal. so years later here I am writing to promote and embrace self love and pleasure. 


Why should couples get to have all the fun with new sex positions? When you're solo and feeling amorous, try one (or two) of these twists on your usual self-love routine.

Testing out new masturbation techniques by yourself will score you two very important sexual health benefits that go beyond simply having a new kind of O (though getting off is pretty important, we have to admit):
First, you'll get more orgasms in the long run — and hotter sex if getting it on with your long-term partner has become a snooze.


"Women who masturbate are more likely to have orgasms during partnered sex, and we believe that this finding is related to an increase in comfort and knowledge with regard to her body, By experimenting with different positions, you can discover new pathways to orgasm and stave off the sexual ruts that arise due to repetition and monotony.



Please share your masturbation pics and stories to encourage others and show that masturbation is normal and natural.
If you would like to post anonymously please email your pics to: angelbea@gmail.com



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